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I roll my eyes whenever I see someone posting on tumblr about how ~intimidating it is to call a doctor's office and make an appointment or how they deserve praise for doing the dishes and ~adulting.
God forbid anyone have a mental or physical illness that prevents them from consistently "adulting", then being proud of themselves for managing when they can.
Kinda funny that this comment comes after two pointing out the issue of money.
I have this terror over the mist inconsequential things that no one would ever guess. On the outside I look like the most adult of adults--I've moved to three different countries on two different continents on my own for work that requires quite a lot of ambition, I've lived on my own throughout this entire process, I like to do my own diy around the house, etc. But honestly I hate doing my taxes so much (I have to do double taxes! My home country's and where I am currently!) that I take two days off work: one day to do it, one day to recover. And I'd quite like to be congratulated for doing my laundry some days.
Maybe some of the tumblr people only whine because it's tumblr and no one irl, where they're otherwise adults, will see.
Maybe some of the tumblr people only whine because it's tumblr and no one irl, where they're otherwise adults, will see.
No, they're actually mad that mutants are a metaphor for POC and LGBT and still very white and straight.
Yeah man. My adult ass had to pay for 2000 dollars worth of therapy to be able to call the doctor with goddamn social anxiety. Damn right I'm gonna brag about it.
This! Definitely! I don't usually brag on myself but I'm pretty sure that most people I know irl would assume I've got my shit together. I've never been late to work in about 3 years with the same company (I'm just out of college), I'm great at budgeting and I've been able to help some friends figure out how to make living on their own work, I have a pretty decent social life? I also have a chronic illness - I've ended up answering work emails from a hospital bed more than a couple times and sometimes I'm in so much (physical) pain that I work from home so no one will see how slowly I need to go or the adaptive equipment I use or that I end up crying over very stupid things, like not being able to hold a cup or having too many typos. I know they're dumb things to cry about but sometimes it just feels so discouraging to not be able to do a little thing like that?
I'm pretty sure that no one I know casually irl knows about this? Which is good! I don't want them to! I don't want to go from being a casual friend or a coworker to "That Sick Person". But it's really really nice sometimes to go on tumblr and get to see people readily acknowledging how much "behind the scenes" work goes into being a person sometimes, idk.
I mean, I know no one really has it easy, even the people who you'd expect to? Everyone's got something going on. But it's really helped me more to hear "Hey, man, good on you! You felt shitty but you made that phone call/did your dishes/ate a decent meal, you're doing alright! Keep it up!" than to hear "Well, everyone's got some shit so if you plan on staying alive, deal." (But I guess I need to hear the second one, too, sometimes, haha.)
I'm pretty sure that no one I know casually irl knows about this? Which is good! I don't want them to! I don't want to go from being a casual friend or a coworker to "That Sick Person". But it's really really nice sometimes to go on tumblr and get to see people readily acknowledging how much "behind the scenes" work goes into being a person sometimes, idk.
I mean, I know no one really has it easy, even the people who you'd expect to? Everyone's got something going on. But it's really helped me more to hear "Hey, man, good on you! You felt shitty but you made that phone call/did your dishes/ate a decent meal, you're doing alright! Keep it up!" than to hear "Well, everyone's got some shit so if you plan on staying alive, deal." (But I guess I need to hear the second one, too, sometimes, haha.)
This is off topic, but why do you end so many declarative sentences with a question mark?
Have you talked to a therapist about your workaholic tendencies though? What you are describing is not a healthy working life long term.
DA. Not sure how a therapist will be able to help with a chronic illness, and they don't come across as especially workaholic to me, but nice condescension.
AYRT - I actually hadn't noticed quite how often I do it when writing casually (versus writing professionally or writing fiction) until you pointed it out, haha. I think I'm trying to compensate for how unclear inflection is when typing, maybe - as a matter of fact, I really want to end this sentence with a question mark, but I won't ;)
AYRT - I do see a therapist when I can afford one/when I have time to, mostly to help me deal with things I literally just can't do because of my illness. Not to overshare, but a "normal" sex life is pretty much out of the question for me. This gets me down pretty badly sometimes. It helps to talk to someone.
I wouldn't call myself a workaholic, I just don't make a lot of money (enough, certainly, but not loads extra) and can't afford to take a lot of unplanned time away from work. When I'm sick, I'm sick for more than just a couple days. Sometimes doing what I need to do to support myself means working from home or while hospitalized.
I also really, genuinely enjoy my work most days!
I wouldn't call myself a workaholic, I just don't make a lot of money (enough, certainly, but not loads extra) and can't afford to take a lot of unplanned time away from work. When I'm sick, I'm sick for more than just a couple days. Sometimes doing what I need to do to support myself means working from home or while hospitalized.
I also really, genuinely enjoy my work most days!
AYRT.
Sorry, didn't mean to imply anything about you or what you should be doing. I personally find it rude to tell strangers online to see a therapist when they didn't ask for advice, but maybe they really were trying to be helpful.
Sorry, didn't mean to imply anything about you or what you should be doing. I personally find it rude to tell strangers online to see a therapist when they didn't ask for advice, but maybe they really were trying to be helpful.
AYRT - I think I might have replied to the wrong person on this thread, yikes!! Sorry!
I'm definitely not looking for advice, though! Not that I think you'd all have bad advice, it's just that I've already spent a lot of time sorting through what does and doesn't work for me.
I'm definitely not looking for advice, though! Not that I think you'd all have bad advice, it's just that I've already spent a lot of time sorting through what does and doesn't work for me.
Loyalty kink kills me, so the whole "emperor/hound" thing that's going around on Tumblr is MY JAM FOREVER.
I find editing things for grammar, punctuation, and general clarity of meaning very soothing. I would love to get into betaing fanfic, and here seems as good a place as any to start.
So, if you would like me to edit something you've written:
1. Put it in a Google Drive document
2. Go to Share
3. Put in birdsquirrels+editing@gmail.com and select "can comment"
4. Reply here with the name of the document and anything you want me to specifically look out for. I'll tell you when I'm done.
If you've got something that isn't TFA fic that you want me to beta/edit, just ask! I'm in a good few other fandoms, and I'm happy to help with that schoolwork you're here procrastinating on. :)
(note to mod: If the no-unanon rule applies here in discussion as well as prompt posts, then feel free to delete this. Since I'm sharing my email, I figured there would be no point to anoning)
So, if you would like me to edit something you've written:
1. Put it in a Google Drive document
2. Go to Share
3. Put in birdsquirrels+editing@gmail.com and select "can comment"
4. Reply here with the name of the document and anything you want me to specifically look out for. I'll tell you when I'm done.
If you've got something that isn't TFA fic that you want me to beta/edit, just ask! I'm in a good few other fandoms, and I'm happy to help with that schoolwork you're here procrastinating on. :)
(note to mod: If the no-unanon rule applies here in discussion as well as prompt posts, then feel free to delete this. Since I'm sharing my email, I figured there would be no point to anoning)
Yes, damn! I don't think I've seen any "emperor/hound" things on my dash, can you link me some?
Yes, this! I only realised this one about myself recently, but damn this is a good fandom to find it in.
Power imbalances where the fic acknowledges it's fucked up and doesn't try to romanticize it. Especially if there are multiple very uneven power dynamics and they don't all favor the same person.
(Okay, okay, anything fucked up where the fic acknowledges it's fucked up and doesn't try to romanticize it.)
(Okay, okay, anything fucked up where the fic acknowledges it's fucked up and doesn't try to romanticize it.)
I do when there's some kind of power dynamic kink happening in the sex. If it's just like...egalitarian sex, then I don't bother because the sex is probably not the focus of the story.
Wut? How do you figure that?
Unrequited love that remains unrequited through to the end. I love either an author willing to stick a sad ending, or finding an alternative the narrative arc that ends happily but not with the main OTP getting together. I love thousands of words of horrendous internal suffering, desperate pining, great emotional pain, and then the person just...getting over it. Moving on. Learning how to cope. Growing up. Whatever.
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