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+ Crossovers, characters from the other media are allowed, but must relate to the 2015 movie in some way.
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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hux was a results-oriented person. He was exacting when it came to detail but not picky about the category -- from budgeting, to timing, scale, handwriting, dry-cleaning, grout, and noise insulation, he created and enforced standards. He didn’t give a rat’s ass about what was interesting, or even particularly good, because those things so rarely correlated with a significant return on investment. Once, at a party, Whitney Port had introduced him as a tall balance sheet.

So when he was hit with an unexpected $60,000 in pool tile fees, he was only able to keep his brain from literally exploding by driving to Ballona Creek and smoking six Turkish Silvers in rapid succession under the bridge.

“I won’t kill him,” he eventually decided. “Because at this point I can’t even afford the quicklime.”

A man walking a sweating West Highland Terrier veered to give him a wide berth.

Hux tossed his last butt into the creek, prompting a look of true offense from the dog-walker, and went back to Outpost to stake out the office.

When Ren returned, it was with a transparently guilty conscience. He stopped to pet the cat, locked the door behind him, and even whistled nonchalantly before journeying upstairs to find his husband.

Hux was lying in wait.

“So I had interesting conversation with the pool tile people,” he said, spinning his white Herman Miller executive chair around to face to door. He had a little too much torque on it, and had to put his feet down to stop the chair. “They said that the order was changed. Yesterday. Changed to five colors of honeycomb glass tile.”

Ren, trapped in the doorway, put his hands in his pockets.

“Was it,” he said, looking at the ceiling, then the walls, then taking his hands out of his pockets to look at them.

Hux steepled his fingers. “Since it was less than two weeks in advance, this was done in person.”

“Oh,” said Ren.

Hux’s voice was quiet, as quiet as it had been before the keys of the Porsche sailed into the bay, quieter than Justin Bobby’s laughter and the roar of the wind. “Apparently, we sent one of our interns in. A guy named Matt.”

Ren was sweating. “We don’t have a Matt.”

“Which is what I said, right before I asked the see the security footage.”

“They let you do that?”

Hux glared, and plugged his laptop’s HDMI cable into the office television. The screen showed footage of the sidewalk outside a store font. After a moment, Kylo Ren appeared in a blond wig, furtively putting on a pair of glasses.

Hux paused the video.

“Is there something you want to tell me?”

There was a meow from the open door. Millicent, encouraged by Ren’s suspicious petting, had sniffed out the controversy and come upstairs.

“Millicent!” Hux shouted. “Can you give us one minute?”

Millicent slipped back out of the door.

“You don’t have any proof,” said Ren. “It’s me in a wig. That’s not proof. You don’t know everything about me, maybe it’s a … sexual thing. Blond wig, flooring storefront, you know, like a --”

“You signed the new order,” said Hux, taking it gently from the desk. He was not about to brandish documents in anyone’s face, though his soul wanted to. “Right here. ‘Intern Matt.’”

“Well,” said Ren. “Intern Matt has good taste.”

When Rey got in with some checks to sign for the Paseo del Serra crew, she breezed into the office to discover Kylo Ren in a blond wig and unflattering aviator-style glasses, bent naked over one of the white Herman Miller chairs. She had expected his ass to look different.

Hux stood behind him, holding a fraternity paddle in one hand and his phone in the other.

“Knock, next time,” he said to Rey. “Did you feed the cat?”

“Not yet,” she said.

“Then go feed the cat. We’ll give Matt the intern a break for today.”

MATT. MATT'S HERE.

I'm watching house flipping shows on Netflix thanks to you, anon. Muah.

omg matt!!

PROMPT POST #3 - CLOSED

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Fill: House Flippers AU [8/?]

Re: Fill: House Flippers AU [8/?]

Re: Fill: House Flippers AU [8/?]