themodawakens ([personal profile] themodawakens) wrote in [community profile] tfa_kink2016-01-13 02:14 pm
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PROMPT POST #2 - CLOSED

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prompt post one



+ All comments except fills should be posted anonymously.
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[FILL, slight prompt deviation] Kylo Ren / [Finn]

(Anonymous) 2016-01-15 12:27 pm (UTC)(link)
So it's 4:30AM and I see your prompt and I start writing and it's not exactly what you wanted but I tried to keep the spirit. The original end was ridic angsty so hopefully this is happier towards the end.

---------

In his mind, Ben Solo wasn't Kylo Ren.

The menacing Kylo Ren was a force outside of himself--a steel mask that rested in some bleak, anemic room somewhere in the depths of space. In the deep pockets of his consciousness, he was just Ben Solo. Despite this, he could count on one hand the number of people who would still call him Ben. Some assorted adults from his childhood, God knows if they are alive still. His uncle. Chewie. His mom.

He winces at the thought of his father.

He can't help but wonder when his life became so complicated, when he's lost complete control of it's trajectory. His initial motivations fail to give him the reassurance he wants at this moment. The thought of his grandfather doesn't bring him comfort anymore and the charred, worn black helmet he cherished seemed to mock him. The only thing that seems to put the young knight's mind at ease was the thought of FN-2187. Finn.

He finds it curious how he didn't notice how much a name mattered. What had he called Finn when he was crying out in pleasure? When he wanted to get his attention when they talked? And, he must have called him something, because Ben knows better than anyone how much he talked when they were together. He rambled on about getting Finn an officer position, about vacations they both knew they couldn't take, about the future, after the war, about a little cottage on a planet like Takodana and a little girl named Leia that had Finn's warm eyes and Kylo's hair.

They'd (or was it just him? Ben couldn't remember) talked about it so much the image was like a memory in Ben's mind. There was Finn, in all his glory, with sunlight dancing on his skin so brightly and so furiously that it almost blinds him. He's saying something to their little girl, her hair in little pigtails and her arms occupied with a little puppy--it was Finn's idea to get it for her, Ben decides, he couldn't stand animals but Finn wouldn't be able to say no to their little darling.

Finn points to the garden's slowly opening gate, says a little more and, suddenly, little Leia is running excitingly towards her namesake. Grandma Organa crouches to scoop up the bundle that is running towards her at high speed. He had almost forgotten how warm and loving his mom's smile was.

Ben savored the scene. Until he heard a voice call out to him, laced with so much innocence and affection that Ben almost didn't realize the words were meant for him. "Papa!" little Leia was reaching her arms up and, like it was second nature, Ben lifted her up and kissed her cheek. She returned the kiss and hugged him tightly.

It didn't make sense but Ben almost wanted to cry as he felt her little hands clutch tightly to his shirt. His little girl--his and Finn's--wanted to be closer to him, not farther. "Papa, I'm going to grandpa and grandma's house now!"

She have him a toothy smile and another peck before his mother collected her. "I'll be sure your father doesn't spoil her too much."

"He said I could drive the 'Maleniam' Falcon!" the little angel chirped.

Ben laughs. It can't remember the last time he's laughed since Finn left. "Don't go too far or else I'll have to search the entire galaxy to find you!"

With a final ruffle of her hair--god, it was exactly like his--the Leias departed and it was just him and Finn, alone.

Ben felt silly feeling awkward but even in his own mind, he wasn't sure how to call out to Finn. Finn saves him the trouble and approaches him, gently saying his name so it drips from his mouth honey. "Ben."

He hears it like a mantra. He's heard Finn chant his name--roughly, sweetly, playfully--but he wants to savor his fantasy. Somehow his mind got it just right this time and he doesn't want to forget.

"FN." He decides to respond with what he knows but it still sounded like Finn and Ben decides he hates the name Finn and the Resistance pilot who came up with it, who has both Finn and his mother while Ben only has faded memories and intangible fantasies.

"Benny," he loved it, though he would never admit it, when FN called him that. "Are you alright? You look like you're on another planet." FN then lets out that low chuckle Ben's heard so many times before.

"I'm fine." Ben leans into FN and puts his arms around his waist. He bends down to place a sloppy, hungry kiss on FN's un-expecting lips. It's been so long since he could conjure up this sensation that he keeps it going until his mind tell him people need to breath in fantasies, too.

"Leia won't be back until next Monday," FN continues between the kisses he's painting Ben's neck with, "No need to rush, we have all the time in the world. I'm not going anywhere."

That last part was almost a whisper but it was the only thing Ben has ever wanted to hear.

blackruzsa: (Default)

Re: [FILL, slight prompt deviation] Kylo Ren / [Finn]

[personal profile] blackruzsa 2016-01-15 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
This is so beautiful
And it hurts the heart
Honestly, wonderful job.

Re: [FILL, slight prompt deviation] Kylo Ren / [Finn]

(Anonymous) 2016-01-16 05:08 am (UTC)(link)
Oh man this is wonderful!! So bittersweet, Ben dreaming about a life and a love he'll never have but wants so badly. And I like how it's Ben that's fantasizing, not Kylo. Like he'll only let himself dream of happiness and love as Ben. I love how Kylo seems quietly devastated that Finn left. I love this fic. Will there be more, or is this a one-shot?

Re: [FILL, slight prompt deviation] Kylo Ren / [Finn]

(Anonymous) 2016-01-16 06:29 am (UTC)(link)
Hi, I'm the OP and I just wanted to let you know that this was absolutely perfect. Thank you so much, it is wonderful and so filled with emotion. I had never thought of this pairing before but you make it all work so beautifully. Seriously, thank you this was awesome.