themodawakens ([personal profile] themodawakens) wrote in [community profile] tfa_kink2016-03-28 08:14 am
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PROMPT POST #5 - CLOSED

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FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 01:06 am (UTC)(link)
The fifth time Kylo turns up outside his door like a bad penny, Hux snaps.

Because he's just - stood there. Staring with his black eyes and mumbling. Awkwardly explaining that the medics said talking to someone familiar would help. That he might remember sooner if he sticks to routine and engages with people.

Hux isn't aware his lip is curling until he sees the [familiar, now] hurt flash across his face.

Snoke has been entirely unhelpful. After all, what use is Kylo to any of them when he's like this. He's still prone to console-wrecking tantrums, but he can't remember the way back to his room, and he follows Hux about the Finaliser when he's finished his physical training, at a loss of how to fill up the rest of the day. He's like an angry fucking duckling.

"We do not speak enough for you plaguing me to be helpful." he says, as evenly as he can.

"You keep saying, but it might-"

"Can't you go and speak to Phasma? Surely you remember the cat she took in? Maybe she's room for another irritating stray."

Ren's mouth twists down.

"She said the same as you, but she also said that we spend more time together than you were letting on."

Fuck. He's going to kill Phasma.

Well. Not literally. She'd beat him to a pulp for his trouble. But he will fiddle with her shift patterns and make them as difficult as possible. She hates 5.30 starts? She's got a month of 5.30 that starts tomorrow. What an unfortunate coincidence.

"Yes. As enemies. You fuck up - constantly - I pick up the pieces, you remain Snoke's golden child. That's it."

Ren's quiet for a moment, looking at the floor. His head is still bruised, a little set of sutures running almost parallel to his saber scar. Hux is glad that the amnesia makes force use both painful and exhausting, because the thoughts he's broadcasting right now have him leaning in and gently pressing his lips to the contusions.

"I brought whisky." he says. "I was told it was your favourite and - it wouldn't be forever-"

Hux snorts. He knows. He fucking knows it won't be forever, and that's why none of this is allowed. If he lets himself have even the slightest piece - he'd be a truly vile person, for one - and he wouldn't want to let go.

It hurts. It all hurts, and it has done for so long. He's pathetic. This sort of weakness - in a general, no less - can't be allowed to blossom. He's no place in his head or in the stubborn, hollow bit of his chest for him. It.

"- and I just thought if I brought a peace offering. That- I would become more - bearable. Perhaps."

Hux digs his nails into his palm.

Kylo sees the tightening of his fist and flinches.

"Listen." He sneers, and he hates that what he wants is literally in front of him, but he's not allowed it. He's Tantalus, and Ren is the water that forever falls through the cracks of his cupped hands. He needs to leave now. "There isn't enough whisky in the world to make you bearable. Not like this, and certainly not as you usually are, so I think the best thing for you to do would be to go back to your room and give me some fucking peace."

Ren's shoulders are hunched in now, like he's taken a blow and is guarding the pain.

"There isn't anyone to talk to there." He says lamely. His voice has gone all uneven.

Hux hates that he's even noticing.

Because- say he was a weaker man. Say he invited Kylo in. Say he dedicated an hour a night to talking to him. What's the worst that could happen?

He'd get attached, that's what. Which would be bad. He's not come this far without being able to identify his strengths and weaknesses.

Strengths: organisation, strategy.

Weaknesses: The fact that even with decades of military upbringing and training and ascension through the ranks, the most resilient bit of him is still his need for affection, and he's always craved it from the wrong people, to boot.

He's a fucking mess. His father would be disgusted by him. Well. Moreso.

"You keep doing this, Ren. Are you lonely, hm?"

There's a weighted silence, but-

He doesn't reply.

Then he's pushing the bottle into Hux's hands and looking at a spot over Hux's shoulder when he speaks.

Look me in the eyes, please. Please, let me have that. See me. Hux thinks.

Kylo doesn't.

"Forget I came - I was stupid, I'm being stupid, I'm sorry-"

"An apology! That's a first!"

Hux wants to kick himself.

Kylo gives a huff of a laugh, but it doesn't sound happy.

"You must despise me, mustn't you?"

He doesn't reply. Kylo gives the quietest sigh.

"Goodnight, general. I won't bother you again." he murmurs, and Hux grips the bottle so tight it's a wonder it doesn't shatter.

Some bit of him inside is quailing, now. He wants to stop him and explain and - be stupid.

He watches Ren retreat down the corridor until he's out of sight.

If after watching him go, he shuts the door and slides down it, shaking...well. Nobody need know.

Great prompt, OP! It was so weird writing Hux having Feelings, but I hope I made him/them believable. Anyway, enjoy!

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
Really glad to see this filled! Loved the mention of Phasma. The dialogue was spot-on. I thought it was a great detail that Hux was thinking at Kylo while knowing that Kylo wouldn't hear him.

(Also: "An apology! That's a first!" …why is Hux so terrible)

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 03:49 am (UTC)(link)
Love it!
Such inner conflict Hux.
I wonder if Ren will wake up remembering this.

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
Ouch. This was painful and perfect. Aw Hux :(

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 11:01 am (UTC)(link)
Damn, Hux, do you want to go and kick some actual puppies as an encore? I mean, regular Kylo is an irredeemable asshole, but amnesiac Kylo - I wonder if he's blanked out decades of Snoke-related baggage? I wonder if he's so persistently tagging after Hux because he's like, "Damn, this guy really has his shit together. I like him a lot, I hope we're friends. Also, he's hot."

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 01:29 pm (UTC)(link)
A!anon here. Oh my god this is making me want to write kylo slowly remembering allllll the snoke!baggage and being horrified. Help.

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

[personal profile] caprica12 2016-04-28 04:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Do it. Do it.
Also Hus having feeling is THE BEST and THE WORST. And Kylo is so... amnesic, damm.

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-28 04:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Different anon here.

1. This was awesome.

2. Please. Please do. Write it. I'm dying for more of this. (And sad sap that I am, I'm dying to see them get some happiness).

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-04-29 12:01 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. I hope you feel inspired to write more because this was so good!

Re: FILL: stubborn needs

(Anonymous) 2016-08-31 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
This is heartbreaking. Poor babies.