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Finn would also have the dorkiest (and yet somehow best) taste in terrible gift shop clothes. Nobody should look good in a fanny pack and patent flip-flops, but Finn does.

It turns out a superior 8-pack is the ultimate fashion accessory, it just makes any outfit work. Gift shop floppy hat? Hideous. Finn wearing that floppy hat? Adorable! Neon knock-off wayfarers? Tacky af. Finn wearing them? Gorgeous. Douchebag shell necklace? No fucking way. Finn puts it on? The staff want to take selfies with him.

Meanwhile General Pale & Paleo Ren are in the background shoplifting all the black clothes.

Kylo being That Significant Other who keeps PDAing Hux and grinding on him and just generally trying to raise hell.

Nobody except Hux cares because Finn and Poe exist.

"What the--! Careful, Ren! We're in public."

"Relax, Hux. No one is looking at us. The traitor is walking around in socks and sandals. People are actually asking for his autograph."

😂

Finn: dressed as Sexy Tourist/Clown
Poe: ♡__♡

This entire thread is making me laugh way too hard.

Oh Poe, Finn is your bulletproof kink.

PALEO REN.

Hux thought he might at least enjoy the food on this enforced vacation but no. Ren is being impossible and mind-tricking the restaurants into catering to his dietary whims.

"Carbs are a tool of the light side. Only protein is fit to fuel the Dark side!"

"Ren, you're eating chocolate cereal."

"It's grain-free cacao nib granola with coconut milk, Hux, not that I expect you to understand the ways of The Force."

When I read that I had this image of a Jurassic World vacation. Paleontology Ren.

AYRT

LMAO, yessss. Ren is all about drastic lifestyle choices he can preach about to a disinterested audience, the more militant and inconvenient the better, so Paleo is perfect for that. Sometimes it conflicts with the five other extreme diets he's doing, but it's fine, the results speak for themselves if he does say so himself. He angles himself to better show off The Shredd™ and catch some appreciative gazes, but instead catches sight of Finn across the room at the breakfast buffet. Finn with his plate piled high with pancakes and waffles. Finn taking a bite of multi-grain toast. Finn wearing pink palm-tree printed cargo shorts without looking like an idiot somehow. Finn with a superior 8-pack.

Kylo's tortured inner monologue: WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT HOW? HOW? HOW? DOES. NOT. COMPUTE. NOPE NOPE NO- OH WHAT? HE ATE IT ALL AND WENT BACK FOR SECONDS??? FOR GRAINS?????? TRAITOR! HUX, HUX, ARE YOU SEEING THIS?? HUX? THIS WHY A CLONE ARMY WOULD BE BETTER! THEY WOULDN'T BETRAY, THEY WOULDN'T CONSUME COMPLEX CARBOHYDRATES, AND THEY WOULDN'T GET MORE SWOLE THAN ME!!!

He sees Finn later happily eating some cheesecake and Kylo immediately drops to the ground and does 2000 self-hating darkside crunches in response -- now's his chance to get ahead!

Hux just hisses "this is worse than your bullshit crossfit phase!" and rolls his eyes, and then eyes the rolls at the lunch buffet.

IM WHEEZING HELP

and rolls his eyes, and then eyes the rolls
Poetic!

The whole thing is poetic!

this is poetry.

PROMPT POST #5 - CLOSED

This post is closed to new prompts!

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Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!

Re: Kylux, Stormpilot - Vacation, Ruined!