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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

If you wanted to find Ben Organa Solo, the first place to look was always in the hangar. The first present he can remember receiving was a set of tools, sized just right for his childish hands. He spent so much time with his head and hands shoved inside of panels and space crafts of all sorts, that people used to joke they couldn’t remember what his face looked like - only his shoes, and his little, coverall clad legs.

He even got his hands into the guts of the Millennium Falcon, once or twice, his father and Chewbacca showing him how to work with a system which had been reworked to the point of ridiculousness. He did fine, of course. Apart from that one slight electrocution, but that was really more like a love zap, and the kid sat up grinning from ear to ear.

He had the Force, humming under his skin like a constant companion, for as long as he could remember. It made it easier to reach wires which were just out of sight or too far away, sometimes gave him a gentle nudge away from a live wire he’d missed, or towards the correct configuration when he’d get stuck. Apart from that, Ben’d never really given much thought to having the Force. After all, Uncle Luke had it, and his mother had it, and their dad had it - as far as the child was concerned, it was just another family trait.

His father knew he had it, as did Chewbacca - they’d seen tools slide across the floor to his hand too many times to be ignorant, but they never said anything. Han, for his part, was delighted that his little boy - his Force wielding, space magician son - was happier elbow deep in the guts of a ship than going off to become a Jedi.

One afternoon, working on a small shuttle which had been put in for repairs, Ben levitated a small panel off the floor. Chewbacca was standing by, ready to catch the panel if something went wrong. Han patted Ben on the back when he gently settled it down, away from the area they were going to be working in. His ‘good job, Ben’ was interrupted by Leia, who’d seen everything. Ben smiled at his mother, unaware of the oncoming storm, and bent down with Chewie to start investigating.

Han stared at his wife, and didn’t say a thing. She left without a word, and Han joined the other two men shortly after, content to ignore the argument he knows will be waiting for him when he gets home.

‘You should have told me!’ Leia will yell, later, a few books and glasses around the room starting to vibrate softly with her anger. She’s extremely force sensitive, but whatever power she might have wielded was lost to the unforgiving hands of time - without practice, without attention, her ability to manipulate the Force had withered.

‘What does it matter? He doesn’t want to be a Jedi, he wants to be an engineer.’ Han drawled in response, knowing that his tone would only rile her further. Sure enough, she almost explodes.

‘What does it matter? If he doesn’t start training soon, he could lose control of his powers. Worse, he-’

‘Could lose them like you did?’ Han cuts in, and Leia’s face goes hard, cold.

‘Exactly. He’ll regret it when he’s older, if we don’t make him train now.’

‘Look, Leia, the kid doesn’t want to go with Luke. Ask him yourself.’ Her lips are in a firm line, and Han knows that look all too well. Nothing he could do or say, nothing anyone could do or say, was going to sway her from her chosen path. He sighs, rubbing a hand across his eyes, before groaning.

‘I’m not telling him. I’m not going to make him go, either. It’s all on you.’ And with that, Han washes his hands of the whole matter, leaving it up to Luke and Leia to convince Ben. They’ll spend a lot of time together, deep in the guts of the Falcon, in the weeks after the revelation.

‘I don’t want to go, Dad.’ He’ll say, quietly, a few weeks after his tenth birthday.

‘I don’t want you to go.’ Han replies, pulling his son into a hug, before refocusing on the speeder they’re tinkering with. It was a present for his birthday; Han’d been planning it for months, a project they could work on together, then he could teach Ben to ride it. Drive it, when he’s old enough. Now he doesn’t know what he’s gonna do with it - Luke’d already said he couldn’t send it with Ben.

He’ll end up taking Ben out for a spin, before the speeder’s really ready. It’ll splutter, and maybe almost explode, but they’ll have fun. Ben’ll even get to pilot it, for a few minutes - Han hovering behind him, ready to step in and take over at the first sign of something going wrong.

Ben will leave the next day, trying not to cry as he boards the shuttle which’ll take him to his Uncle and the future he does not want. He’ll hug his father, and Chewbacca, but will only wave at his mother in a fit of childish pique. Ben won’t regret not hugging her until that night, when he’s laying in his new bed wanting nothing more than his parents. He’ll cry himself to sleep, every night for a month. He stops feeling as much, after that. Not just the sorrow and grief, but everything - emotions slowly slipping through his hands until there’s nothing but rage.

He’ll forget his tool box, and only remember that it’s sitting in the Falcon halfway through the shuttle ride. He’ll never get to go back to it, or see it, again.

*sobbing*

Oh god! I can't believe how affecting this ~Matt origin story~ is, it's so heart-wrenching and plausible. Little Ben reminds me of Rey, how she crawled around inside the Millennium Falcon, fixing shit, saving the day, finding her place and getting a job offer from Han -- that could've been Ben.

This is just beautiful and heartbreaking. Didn't expect to ever see a Matt fic that makes me feel things.

This is so sad, and so good.

OP here -- I love it! Little Ben being so excited to work on the Falcon was adorable. And then you went and stomped on my heart. Excellent. Well done.

PROMPT POST #4

This post is closed to new prompts!

Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?

Re: Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?

Re: Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?

Re: Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?

Re: Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?

Re: Fill: Kylo/Hux, Matt is what Ben wanted to be 1/?