This was amazing, god, that "they'll think bad thoughts about me" is so all-consuming, but so vague, ugh. I started purging as self-harm to deal with it, it was killer. I used lavender cream for my baby, who co-slept with me for ages, and now I put lavender oil in my hair before bed most nights. I was it off in the morning, but aside from making my hair pretty, it surrounds me with lavender and the scent soaks into my pillow and it's so so calming.
Re: OP